“Sometimes the most productive thing you can do is relax.” — Mark Black
A few days ago, I found myself caught in the same old cycle—waking up, rushing through tasks, checking my phone, working non-stop, and always thinking about the next thing. It felt like I was constantly on the go, but somehow, I never felt truly present. Then, one day, I hit a wall. I realized I was so busy that I’d forgotten how to just be. I was burned out, anxious, and completely exhausted.
This made me think about the whole “being vs. doing” debate. In our busy lives, we often overuse the ‘doing’ mode and neglect the ‘being’ mode, which can lead to stress, burnout, and feeling disconnected from ourselves. So, how do we find a healthy balance? Do we need to slow down, or should we keep pushing forward? Let’s clear this up once and for all.
What’s the Difference?
Being is about the present moment. It’s feeling the sun on your skin, truly listening to a friend, or just sitting without thinking about the next task.
Doing is about action. It’s setting goals, making progress, and getting things done.
The real question isn’t which one is better—it’s how to balance both.
When you are busy, you are taking action, but when you are still, you are creating space for your soul.” — Anonymous
Mind Patterns: Understanding How They Shape Your Balance
Before we get into the details of how to balance being and doing, it’s important to consider your mind patterns—the automatic ways your mind responds to situations.
Doing Mode Mind Patterns:
When you’re constantly in “doing” mode, your mind tends to focus on what needs to be done next, checking off tasks, and seeking validation through accomplishment. This pattern can cause stress, anxiety, and a sense of never being “enough.” It often leads to burnout when you don’t allow yourself to pause.
Being Mode Mind Patterns:
When you focus on “being,” your mind learns to relax, let go of urgency, and embrace stillness. However, if you stay in this mode for too long without any structure or goals, it can lead to feelings of aimlessness, boredom, or a lack of motivation.
The Science Behind It
Our body has two systems that help us manage being and doing. These systems work automatically to keep us in balance.
Sympathetic Nervous System (Fight-or-Flight Mode):
This system kicks in when we’re facing something stressful or challenging. It gets us ready to take action—whether that’s running from danger, finishing a task, or solving a problem. It makes us feel alert, focused, and active. When we’re busy, working, or stressed, this system is in charge.
Parasympathetic Nervous System (Rest-and-Digest Mode):
When the stress is over, this system helps us relax. It slows our heart rate, calms our thoughts, and helps us recover. This system supports “being” because it helps us feel peaceful and at ease. When we take breaks, meditate, or rest, the parasympathetic system is in control.
Both systems work together to help us switch between action and relaxation, keeping us healthy and balanced.
Why Does This Matter?
Being busy is not the same as being productive.” — Anonymous
Ever feel exhausted even after a productive day? That’s what happens when you’re stuck in constant “doing” mode.
On the other hand, ever had days where you feel lost, unmotivated, or like you’re just floating through life? That’s what happens when you’re only “being” with no direction.
We need both to feel happy and fulfilled.
Real-Life Examples: ‘Being’ vs. ‘Doing’
Morning Routine: Rushing through emails while eating breakfast (doing) vs. enjoying your coffee and feeling the warmth of the sun (being).
Conversations: Thinking about what to say next (doing) vs. really listening and being present (being).
Chasing Goals: Hustling and working hard (doing) vs. also appreciating the journey (being).
Meditation: Trying to force a clear mind (doing) vs. letting thoughts come and go naturally (being).
Signs You Need More ‘Being’ or ‘Doing’
Life needs balance. If you’re always busy, you might feel exhausted. If you’re not taking action, you might feel stuck. Here’s how to tell if you need more being or doing in your life.
You Need More ‘Being’ If:
You feel constantly tired, anxious, or overwhelmed.
When you’re always working, thinking, or planning, your mind and body don’t get enough rest. If you feel drained all the time, you might need to slow down and give yourself a break.
You struggle to enjoy life because you’re always planning the next thing.
If you finish one task and immediately start thinking about the next, you’re stuck in “doing” mode. Life isn’t just about completing tasks—it’s also about experiencing them. Taking a moment to pause and appreciate where you are can help.
You feel disconnected from yourself or others.
Constant activity can make you lose touch with your emotions and relationships. If you feel distant from people or from your own thoughts, spending quiet time alone or having meaningful conversations can help you reconnect.
You Need More ‘Doing’ If:
You feel stuck, bored, or uninspired.
If every day feels the same and nothing excites you, it might be because you’re not taking action. Too much stillness can make life feel empty. Adding small activities or goals can bring energy back into your routine.
You lack motivation or a sense of purpose.
When you don’t have something to work toward, it’s easy to feel lost. Even setting a simple goal—like cleaning one area of your home or learning something new—can help you build momentum and feel more purposeful.
You find yourself putting things off or avoiding challenges.
If you keep delaying tasks and waiting for the “perfect time” to start, you might be stuck in “being” mode for too long. Sometimes, the best way to move forward is to take one small step, even if you don’t feel ready.
How to Balance Being and Doing
Balance is not something you find, it’s something you create.” — Jana Kingsford
Finding the right balance between being and doing isn’t always easy. If you’re always busy and rushing, you might need to slow down. If you feel stuck and unmotivated, you might need to take action. Here’s how to adjust when things feel off.
If You’re Always Doing, Try These:
Mindful Pauses – Take a few moments during the day to just stop and breathe. You don’t have to wait for the weekend to relax—just pause for a minute, look around, feel your breath, and notice where you are. Even a short break can help you feel more present.
Enjoy Small Moments – Life isn’t just about finishing tasks—it’s also about experiencing them. When you eat, actually taste your food. When you walk outside, feel the breeze. When talking to someone, listen fully instead of thinking about what to say next. These little moments make life richer.
Meditation – If your mind is always racing, try sitting still for just 5 minutes. Close your eyes, focus on your breath, and let your thoughts come and go. Meditation isn’t about stopping thoughts—it’s about watching them without getting caught up in them. Over time, this helps you switch from always “doing” to simply “being.”
If You’re Stuck in Being and Not Taking Action, Try These:
Set Small Goals – If you feel lost or unmotivated, don’t wait for motivation to come to you—take one small step. Pick something simple, like writing one page, making one call, or going for a 5-minute walk. Small actions build momentum.
Create a Routine – Sometimes, too much “being” can leave you feeling directionless. A basic daily routine—like waking up at the same time, setting work hours, or planning meals—gives structure. When your days have a flow, it’s easier to take action.
Use Movement – Physical movement naturally shifts you into action mode. If you’re stuck in overthinking or feeling lazy, try walking, stretching, or even dancing to your favorite song. Movement wakes up your body and mind, making it easier to step into “doing” mode.
Conclusion
A balanced mind is the state we’re striving for. It’s about knowing when to act and when to rest. With this mindset, you can focus on your tasks without feeling overwhelmed or stressed and still enjoy moments of relaxation without feeling guilty. The balanced mind lets you smoothly switch between doing and being, staying grounded and motivated at the same time.
This is the ideal state where you can get things done while also taking care of yourself. It’s not about being constantly busy, nor is it about being stuck in thought. It’s about finding a flow—when the right action happens at the right time, and rest feels as natural as work.
You don’t have to choose between being and doing—you need both. Take action toward your goals, but also slow down enough to enjoy life. Because at the end of the day, life isn’t just about how much you do—it’s about how much you actually experience.
By balancing both being and doing, we can live a more fulfilling and peaceful life. Remember, it’s not about choosing one over the other—it’s about combining them in a way that works best for you.
Now, take a deep breath. This moment is yours. Just be.
